Jewish Dating Blog | The inside scoop – Jewish Dating wisdom from the Matchmaker

I am thrilled, I recently got the email all matchmakers hope to receive..we are engaged. It is always wonderful to hear when a couple finds there soul mate, but to be part of an amazing feeling. I have a few engagements now, and hope that there will be many more.

I keep on reminding myself as well as the other matchmakers I work with…this is why we do it. For all the compliants, people not being satisfied with the matches, the phone calls, and emails, the frustations for you as well as us…but when the call or email comes in..WOW what a feeling.

So for all of you still hoping, lets see what we can do, I hope your email/phone call will be my next

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Well it has been awhile since I have written in. My advise to you continues be flexible, open minded, willing to meet even if you think they are not “your look”, your “taste” … never know.

 Don’t give up – but also take the chance…..

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We are just hours away from the start of Rosh Hashanah – it is a time to reflect, ask forgiveness, and think of what we would like for the coming year.

 May this year bring all of you what you hope and pray for. May this year bring a year of many more of you to find there beshert, and may this year only bring health, happiness to us all.

 Lets go into the year with only great thoughts and and no matter how you spend it – in synagogue, temple, or just around those that you find dear to you – please think of those that are by themselves – and wish everyone a Chag Semach – Shana Tova for a very sweet new year.

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Wow, another year has passed us by – Rosh Hashanah is just days away.

I remember sitting in synagogue and always hoping that this would be the year for me to meet someone. I have been married now – just over 8 years. It took me over 20 years of thinking this – getting married at 40.

Over time you either get more or less “picky” – but maybe it is time to be realistic with what you are looking for. There are a lot of great men and woman who are still single  -  it is difficult to meet – but take every opportunity  given to you – maybe by this time next year you will be saying Thanks…and in our prayers this year – maybe ask for a little help

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You meet someone – and everything is great – they are wonderful – treat you amazing – you are so compatible – but…

You are not attracted to them – the “Chemistry” is just not there. Give it time, if everything else is so great – the chemistry can come – the physical is only part of a relationship – and the physical on the person is usually the first thing to change.

How many woman put on weight with each child – and can never seem to get it off, how many men as they get older stop working out – and get the “beer belly” – or never have worked out.

Look at the person for who and what they are – yes you have to be attracted to someone – but the attraction can grow – everything else – is what is really needed in the relationship to make it work for years to come.

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We have a match – this is not so easy. If you got a call that someone had suggested a match would you consider going on a blind date?

Well think of on-line dating similar to this – but you get to view a little of what they say about themselves and could even view a picture. Now remember – that picture could be updated.

Interesting story – of friend of ours recently mentioned that he went on a date with a woman he met through an on-line site. He viewed a picture – they emailed back and forth and decided to meet. He got to the door, he said she had to weigh 300 pounds..

I am not saying this will happen to you – but think of it this way -maybe the person you are saying no to – the picture is outdated, they are not photogenic, they can’t express themselves on paper -

What am I saying – take the chance go out, or at least speak on the phone, you just never know.

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“We are engaged”…it was so incredible to get this email, it is always wonderful to hear when someone gets engaged, but to be part of is so amazing. Happy to say, this was not my first engagement as a matchmaker, and I hope I will have many more.

For all of us, getting the email that a couple got engaged, no matter how many emails we get of the members who ar upset about the site, or the amount of matches or lack of them, I always let them know how many people have met, and are going out. We are making matches, people are meeting each other

To me and I believe most of us who are busy making the matches, if through all our work, even one couple meet, then it is so worth all the work we do, the emails, the declined matches, the email to members back and forth…

So now having couples on the site who met and got married, to all of those who met and are engaged, or even just going out..and some for 2 years already, and to the many more matches we hope to make. I want to say THANK YOU..

Thank you for giving me the opportunity to be part of you present and future. Thank you for giving us the opportunity to help you meet your beshert, because hearing those words – “We are engaged” – makes all my hours at the computer worth it..

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When you are matched with someone – what is one of the first things you look at? The picture, the description of themselves – the age, there interests?

Lets speak a moment about age. Everyone has an idea of how old/young they want there partner to be. Obviously when you get to see a profile that information is right there. So what do you do, if they are to old/to young, not what you where hoping for…

 When you meet someone, is ther first thing you going to ask them is how old are they? Obviously not, so why make age such a big thing – who cares if they are a little older, younger  or not what you where hoping for. Age should not be the priority.

Just a little more advise – and something to reconsider when you are looking at a profile

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Recently I had an experience with one of our members on the site. He was frustrated that sometimes he didn’t get to see the matches – (well if they where sent to the woman first and they where declined he wouldn’t get to view them, or if they where sent out to both of them and she saw it first and declined), we can’t guarantee who is the one who will see the match first. We have no control over who will decline the match. We can only hope when we make a match – that it will be accepted. Do you agree to every date someone tries to fix you up with?

Just because you may not be happy with the service, that doesn’t mean this way works for everyone. We all have our stories of how we met someone . It could be while traveling, a dating site, blind date, through work, through friends, or just happen to bump into them on the street.

Just because you are not happy with one way – does not mean you should “bad mouth” that way, maybe it is not for you – so move on and try another way.

But remember, if you are so miserable that will come out when you meet someone – no one wants to meet up with a negative person, let it go, move on and see what happens. �

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Okay dating may not be the simpliest thing out there, but you have to go through it in order to meet your spouse. What can you do to make it a little easier. Do things you enjoy doing – at least if you don’t get along you can make the best of the evening.

Don’t plan an elaborate first date – go for coffee, this way if things don’t go well, it is just a couple of hours and not such an expensive “date”.

Make the best of it, and as I always say - network. But don’t complain to your date about your experience’s with dating – unless you can put humour into it..

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